Addressing Behavioral Concerns in Children

Parenting is the toughest job anyone will ever have. Raising the next generation of people can be challenging, especially when children can exhibit such a wide range of behavioral issues.

Behavioral Concerns in Children

At Jiguar, we often see children exhibiting behavioral issues outside of what is considered “normal” for their specific age. Such behavioral issues can disrupt not just the child, but their family, school, and social life as well. Common signs of behavioral issues can include:

• Tantrums and outbursts.
• Profound changes in behavior or personality.
• Lying and/or stealing.
• Harming or threatening to harm themselves, others, or pets.
• Early substance abuse.
• Early sexual activity.
• Poor performance in school.
• Hostility toward authority.

Common Behavioral Disorders in Children

Behavioral concerns can be caused by changes in a child’s life as well as common behavioral disorders. Some common behavioral disorders may include:

• Depression
• Bipolar Disorder
• Anxiety Disorder
• Learning Disorders
• Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)
• Conduct Disorder (CD)
• Oppositional Defiance Disorder (ODD)
• Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD)
• Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)

Other Contributing Factors

There are several other factors which may contribute to behavioral changes in children. This can include emotional problems, mood disorders, and changes occurring within a family’s dynamics such as a divorce or the death of a parent. Substance abuse, mental health issues, and hormonal changes occurring with normal human development can also contribute to behavioral changes in children and teens.

What Parents Can Do

Addressing behavioral concerns in children of any age requires consistency and effort. Consistency is the first step as children need to understand there are consequences for negative behavior, but there are also rewards for positive behavior. Parents, caregivers, and educators must provide consistent consequences and rewards based on a child’s behavior.

Parents need to be specific about expectations. Children need to know what your expectations are and what is not acceptable. If a child throws a tantrum when asked to get ready for bed, parents can institute a bedtime routine that the child can rely upon. The timing and steps for preparing for bed each night should be the same such as taking a bath, putting on pajamas, brushing teeth, and then a bedtime story from mom or dad after being tucked in. Giving a ten-minute warning before bathtime in this scenario will allow the child to mentally prepare for bedtime.

Start by praising positive behavior. When your child is doing things well, tell them you appreciate how hard they are working, that you love them and their positive steps toward better behavior, and that you are proud of them. You might clap for them, give them a high five, or provide a nice hug when they do well. For example, you might say, “I know you were not feeling up to visiting Grandma today, but you did a fantastic jobof talking with her and putting a smile on her face. Keep up the excellent work!” Positive praise goes a long way when it comes to addressing behavioral concerns.

A reward system can also support positive behavior. For example, adding a sticker to a sticker chart for each day a child brushes their teeth without throwing a tantrum with a special reward at the end of the week for collecting so many stickers. Such reward systems work best for children over age two and can take up to two months before they begin to work, so parents must remain patient and vigilant.

Like adults, children are not perfect and cannot be expected to achieve perfection. Parents should ignore minor misbehaviors and focus on bigger issues. Parents need to start with the greatest behavioral concerns first and work backwards from there.

Parents can track behavior to watch for trends, improvement, or increased issues. Keep a daily diary of what is happening with your child. This is a great tool for getting a look at the big picture of your child’s behavioral issues and you can share it with your child’s doctor and/or therapist.

Be open with your child and let them know they can come to you without fear. Sex and substance abuse are huge issues as children enter middle and high school age. Talk with children about sex and substance use in an age-appropriate manner. Explain how sex can have grave consequences from unplanned pregnancy to sexually transmitted diseases. Talk about substances including alcohol and drugs as well as the impact on the body and mind. Finally, be prepared to answer questions from children, especially about your own experiences.

Give your child space and time that is age appropriate for them to cool down when unruly behavior strikes. Do not try to reason with a child when they are upset. Give them time alone in their room to decompress before speaking with them. This is a “cool off” period for your child. When behavioral concerns raise their ugly head, isolate the child for a period of one minute per year of age. That means a three-year-old would need three minutes alone in their room before discussing their behavior. When you do speak with them, use empathy and connection.

Teach children resilience. Many studies have been done on resilience and how it helps produce adults who can effectively cope and function in the world. Children need to understand that everyone makes mistakes, and we can recover from them. Guide them through their emotions and behavior so they can examine how they failed to meet expectations, then discuss what they can do better next time.

Behavioral Therapy

Therapy is another great method for addressing behavioral concerns in children of all ages. Children are most responsive to behavioral therapy before age 7, but such therapy can still support positive behavioral changes in older children and teens. It can also help parents learn effective methods and techniques for guiding their children to better behavior. Treatment for behavioral issues may include individual therapy, group therapy, family therapy, and even classes.

For more information on addressing behavioral issues in children or teens, visit Jiguar online or email info@jiguar.com.